Reflections: My Own Worst Enemy
In thinking about the ongoing sexual abuse allegations against Christian apologist, Ravi Zacharias and the disappointment and sadness it has brought to so many of his followers, I am left with a great amount of self-reflection in my own personal struggles as a human being. Of course, it is easy to look at a spiritual giant like Ravi and express shock, or even outrage, but I feel no pride in condemning his actions any more than I condemn my own at times. It’s this very thought and the verse below that led me to write this song some time ago. It’s perhaps the darkest song I’ve ever written, but it rings true for me and its message rang true for Paul.
“For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate… For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing” (Romans 7:15, 18b-19) <–read the whole passage if you get a chance!
Did Ravi hate his sin as Paul did? Some might argue, no, because he continued to defend himself til the end, but how often do we justify our own struggles and addictions? Yes, we must speak out against his actions and protect the victims, but we should also remember, there but for the grace of God go I…
MY OWN WORST ENEMY
Written by Jakki Jelene
I know that I shouldn’t feel this way
It’s everything I shouldn’t be
It’s everything I know that is wrong in the world
But I can’t seem to set myself free
This broken shell that I call my home
Robs me of my sanity
I’ve come to resent my own reflection
Can’t face my humanity
And the flames swallow me whole
I’m longing to feed my hungry soul
I’m lost in the cold
And before I grow old
Save me from me
I’m my own worst enemy
My eyes are wide, never satisfied
I desire the things that I see
And somehow I just can’t get enough
I reach out when I should turn and flee
I’m victim to the urge of my flesh
To do what I know shouldn’t be done
And still I say yes when I should say no
Being bad can be so much fun
And the flames swallow me whole
I’m longing to feed my hungry soul
I’m lost in the cold
And before I grow old
Save me from me
I’m my own worst enemy
And the flames swallow me whole
I’m longing to feed my hungry soul
I’m lost in the cold
And before I grow old
Save me from me
I’m my own worst enemy
I’m my own worst enemy (save me from me)
I’m my own worst enemy (save me from me)
I’m my own worst enemy (save me from me)
